i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize
