Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
