I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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