I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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