I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
