Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
