Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
