You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i just google imaged poop.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
