i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
