I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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