I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
