Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
