I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
