Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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