I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize