gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
