You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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