I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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