def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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