she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
