Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Acid is not a monday night drug
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
