so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
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Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
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Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
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