So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize