she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
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There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
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well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
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