playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
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