I must be too annoying 4 u.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
