Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
