Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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