Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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