I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i just google imaged poop.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
