party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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