no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Randomize
