i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
