Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
