Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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