She is in my trunk
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
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It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
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You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
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