So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I love you. Go after that dick
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