Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
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Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
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