he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
