Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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