I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
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Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
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she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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