did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
