is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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