Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
