You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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