thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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