I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize