Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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