youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
