it wasn't lemon gatorade
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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