I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
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